maybe i just don't want to be alone

i am having mood swings and i am not liking it.
i am super happy at one moment, than out of nowhere, i crash. i crash so badly i can't erase the frown on my forehead nor breathe out the heaviness of my heart. i snap when somebody talks to me, i feel irritated. like an itch creeps all over my skin in a wave sending me into shivers of disgust. i always thought that my happy moments were true happy moments, that the smiles i radiate are genuine and real, that the giggles i slip out are due to authentic ecstatic emotions. maybe they are... but thinking about it now?
maybe I'm just too tired of putting up a facade.